Posted on October 1, 2013
Let me preface this post by saying it wasn’t the easiest thing to put together an article that included nothing but images that feature my face. ;) Self portraits can be rough. I’m so much more comfortable behind the camera. Getting out in front of the lens and being captured in the photos I’m taking isn’t my favorite thing to do. BUT I can say that every time I’ve pushed myself to do it … to get in there with my babies and my family and actually have a place in our recorded family memories, I’ve been so happy I did.
I remember at times feeling like I didn’t look good enough for photos or just felt uncomfortable being in them, but the only thing my family and children see when they look at the memories we’ve captured is the mommy and wife they know and love. And I know that in years to come the photos I took that included all of us together will be treasured by my kids and by my husband and me. Also, I want to note that this post isn’t only for those with a spouse and/or children … make sure to get in the photos with all your loved ones – parents, grandparents, siblings, family and friends.
Nail the settings first.
Decide where you want the image taken and set everything just as you would a normal shot … white balance, ISO, shutter speed, aperture (with the thought in mind that it will be easier to nail focus with a narrower aperture – see below), your focus point (using a stand in to set focus – see below), etc. Don’t forget to watch your light and decide (with the help of your stand in if needed) where the best location is to catch great lighting (see this post for tips on finding great light).
Get a little help.
Use a family member, or as an alternate stand in you can use a doll or pretty much any object that can be easily moved, etc, to set your focus point and to meter for correct exposure. It can be something that will be on the same focal plane as you once you join the frame, or something you’ll replace with you once you get in there. As usual, press your shutter halfway to set focus or your back button focus. And this is important … once you have the focus set, switch to manual focus so that your camera doesn’t try to re-focus in autofocus mode (the little switch is on the side of your lens). I often use my husband, kids or one of my girls’ baby dolls for setting my focus before entering the shot.
My little two year old assistant was too short to be my quickie stand in, so I had her hold a stuffed animal up so I could set my focus point and eyeball my exposure.
The resulting image is this maternity shot of me at 19 weeks pregnant with my third baby …
Here I had no little people about to help me out, so I used one of my daughter’s baby dolls. She even donned one of the necklaces I’d be wearing to help me out. ;)
And husbands work well for stand in’s too!
Stop down. Get everyone in focus.
Even though I love shooting wide open for a beautiful blurred background and bokeh, it is much easier to nail your focus if you stop down (increase your f-stop number). This is especially true if it’s more than just you in the frame or if you aren’t going to be certain of your exact position and focal plane (such as lifestyle shots that are more candid in nature). Try an f-stop of around f4 or even f5.6 and higher. If you’re finding you are not hitting your focus point, try stopping down again … increasing that f-stop number will make finding great light even more important though, so keep that in mind!
This is me and my clan looking all out goofy for my daughter’s sixth birthday party – rock star themed, of course. :) Talk about looking silly for the sake of memories! But I’m SO happy I did! You can see more of the party and some more self portraits I did for that day here. And I’ll be blogging this year’s party (a pirate themed party that was amazingly fun), very soon too!
For this Christmas image of all of us in front of the tree before having breakfast and then opening presents, I shot at f1.4 and was able to get a group of four all in focus because I used my 24mm lens. The shorter focal length gives me added depth of field, and also we tried to stay on roughly the same focal plane as much as possible. To be safe though, in general I’d recommend shooting with at least an f-stop that equals your number of subjects (so, an f4 for this image would have been a bit easier to nail focus, especially if shooting with longer focal lengths).
For those interested, this was shot on a tripod with my D4 and my Nikon 24mm lens at ISO 500, f1.4, 1/160 second … natural light from a large window, and the tripod/camera is low to the ground (love my tripod for it’s flexibility) and sitting about four feet from us. A really quick edit with Luminosity Photoshop actions Verve (low opacity), Petal Soft (painted on background) and Vintage Vanilla.
Use a tripod.
I hate tripods … I never use them in my sessions in day to day work. However, I will almost always use a tripod when shooting self portraits and family images with me in them. A great tripod that’s compact and designed for travel but high quality (and comes in pretty colors!) is the MeFoto.
I use and absolutely adore the The Manfrotto 222 Joystick Head on the Manfrotto 058B Aluminum Studio Pro Tripod … it’s very intuitive and superbly made, but I find that it’s a bit overkill if you’re just using it for self portraits here and there (it does happen to be amazing outdoors and in difficult terrain, and is ninja fast to re-adjust on the fly).
The only exception to using a tripod for self portraits is when I borrow my husband as sort of a human tripod – getting all my settings just right, standing in exactly the spot I need to frame the shot and then giving him strict instructions not to move or fiddle with anything. The pitfall is sometimes he does move a bit and my composition is ruined, however, the plus side is that he knows how to check focus one more time and help me by making sure that focal point is still where it needs to be once I jump in the frame. A few of my maternity photos were taken this way by my lovely husband. The one below was one I kept struggling with by myself because getting the focus to stay on my face and get myself positioned just right behind the flowers was tough … human tripod (his own name for himself, btw) to the rescue! ;) To his credit, I’ve been teaching him the ropes for a couple years now and he’s getting quite adept at handling the camera in manual mode.
Get a remote.
I’m guilty of forgetting the remote more than a few times, but when you have one it sure does make things easier and more relaxed. Whether I’m using the remote or not I always use the self timer and do a sequence of 10 shots in a row with a couple seconds in between each shutter release. With a remote you can set everything this way, get into position, fire the remote and then have time to stash the remote somewhere out of sight (my remote has been known to go flying across the room a time or two when I didn’t have a handy place to hide it in the frame). Having the self timer on AND using the remote will give you time to get comfortable and relaxed, interact with each other, tickle the kiddos, hide the remote, etc. Having it set to shoot off multiple exposures will allow you to capture more than just one stiff shot … everyone can act more natural and also end up with a series of different “poses” at the end.
This is the Nikon wireless remote I use remote for Nikon. There are also wireless remotes with timers built in … here is one Nikon version. Here is a Canon version, and the Canon version that is a Wireless Remote With Timer here.
With my remote and timer on with a burst of about ten images set, I was able to actually read to the girls to get more natural shots and not have to hurry and fake it. :)
Be spontaneous and natural.
Let the kids act like themselves, take shots of everyone interacting with each other, be silly to loosen everyone up and don’t think that a good shot has to have everyone politely sitting and smiling at the camera! If it helps you to feel more comfortable in front of the camera, by all means do your hair and make-up and/or tidy up (this also will depend on whether you are shooting some candids of you and the kids playing or a more formal portrait of you with the family). For more information on taking lifestyle photography, with plenty of tips and tricks, see the This Is Our Life post. And if you’re looking to do a more styled session and want tips on what to wear for the whole family see What to Wear for Photo Sessions. :)
Document important changes, transformations and journeys for yourself.
Boost your confidence and discover new things about yourself.
While at the end of my third and final pregnancy, I made sure to take more maternity photos than I’d ever dreamed I’d be taking. It was rough because I’m so uncomfortable in front of the camera – add to that being very pregnant and in various states of undress, and also in charge of the entire session from taking the photos to the creative styling and being the model, and I was a wreck. For some reason, feeling vulnerable in front of the camera when you are the one in charge was even tougher. There was nobody to reassure me I’m looking okay or give me hints about how I could pose a bit differently to have them turn out more flattering … it took A LOT of mistakes to get the good ones for those sessions. But it was SO worth it! You can see the entire session here.
Capture yourself playing with your kids and family. My daughter loves it when I get silly and spin and dance with her, and I’m so glad I set things up and captured some of these moments to remember.
Let go of your fears and self-doubt.
We have all been in the position where we just don’t feel like having our photo taken. Maybe we think, “When I can get into shape, or when I have time to do my hair or put on make-up, or I don’t want to look silly …” But it seems like those days we opt out of family moments in photos and stay hidden behind the camera just pile up and pretty soon we’re looking back at albums of photos where mommy (or daddy) seems to be missing from all of the family memories.
No make-up, unbrushed hair, reading stories on the sofa … just the way girls see their mommy most days and will remember me …
Personal share alert …
I often think about my children looking back at all the photos of their childhood. They won’t care if my hair was styled or not (heck, who am I kidding … they won’t care about it even being washed or not, LOL), or if I was wearing yoga pants and a spit-up covered shirt, etc, etc. They’ll be searching their childhood photos for the mommy they remember and love. They’ll yearn to see their mother right next to them in the photos … holding them, laughing with them, making precious memories with them. They will treasure those photos. A few years ago I made a pledge to start being in more photos with my family and am proud to say that I’ve stuck to it. This is a little (okay, a big) excerpt from what I wrote back in 2011 (this was way before my baby boy was born):
“I’m really trying to make every moment count with these precious girls. I’ve felt almost panicked lately when the days end and I look at their beautiful, sleeping faces. I regret every second that I wasn’t totally present with them … I want a “re-do” for the minutes I was doing something like cleaning or some other task that could have waited while I soak up all these wonderful moments of their childhood. The precious, fleeting baby-ness of Miss Eliza and Adeline’s constant learning and looking more and more like a young lady every day. Really, why can’t these years slow down … why can’t us mommies enjoy these moments longer than the time we are allowed before our babies get big?
As Scott talks to me about needing to invest in our retirement plan and other plans for the future I always tell him *these* are the best years of our lives right NOW. I’m so aware of how fast they are growing and it’s so bitter sweet that I almost feel like I am not able to shake a feeling of sadness because I just want to stop time every day. Is that weird??
I have noticed looking over the year’s past images that they are all beautiful, are all full of wonderful moments captured and are all missing one important part of our family … ME. ;) Miss Addie even asked me the other day why I’m not in any of our family photos. So, whether it be by crappy web camera shot of us together in bed in the morning or an iPhone at the grocery store or actually jumping into our family session photos and dragging the tripod along with me (and, yes, that means possibly having to put make-up on), I’m going to make sure that these sweet girls have photo albums full of precious family memories that include their mommy. I happen to adore looking back at my childhood snapshots … and I don’t give a hoot how “perfect” anyone looked, in fact the goofier my family looked the more memories that flood back.
When my baby brother died a few years ago I desperately sought out every image that he was in, copied and cataloged them and was bitterly disappointed to find that we had so few. When the police showed up at my doorstep that horrible morning, I crumpled to the floor and then immediately ran to grab the first photo I could find of my baby brother, Brett. I needed that connection, to see his smiling face again. For two years I carried around a dogeared travel album that contained the very few precious photos I had of him and I together. I know each one by heart and would sit staring at them with tears streaming down my face, talking to Brett.
Then after being diagnosed with a chronic illness several years ago I went through the same panic and heartbreak. I was being faced with the possibility that I would never again be the kind of mommy Addie had always loved and known … the one who jumps on the bed with her every night, plays chase and throws her in the air at the park, the one who takes care of her no matter what. My illness landed me in bed and unable to do anything for an entire summer. I had to sit by and watch Addie cry that mommy couldn’t play at the park or go for family walks. I could barely stand up and was forced to crawl to the restroom since my heart soared to 180 bpm simply from standing up and I was passing out constantly. I remember so clearly lying there and gathering my photos of me and Addie together. I still have that collection in Lightroom as a reminder … and it was such a tiny number of photos it broke my heart to pieces. I had thousands upon thousands of Adeline by herself or with Scott but only a small handful where I was in the photo as well.”
And I’ve done a great job of including myself in our family portraits and lifestyle shots the past couple years since then … but I neglected to make a point of capturing beloved family members outside our home as well. Now, as my mama has been in the ICU in critical condition for many months and may not make it through, I am searching my photos trying to find the tiny handful of images I have of my kids with their nana over the past couple years. And I have even fewer of my babies with my daddy, who is suffering from late stage Parkinson’s disease. As photographers we should never forget how important photographs are!
I’m determined to make sure my children have not only a slew of memories to look through (and vow to actually have them all printed in albums as keepsakes instead of sitting on my hard drive), but I want to be sure that I’m in them as well. I don’t want them to end up searching through our photos (should something happen to me, knock on wood) desperately looking for the rare photo of the mommy they remember. And will they care if I feel like I’m out of shape or don’t have make-up on or what have you … absolutely not. I want to tell all of you mommies (and daddies and grandparents, etc) who read this to do the same thing – jump in there for your family photos and with your kiddos and be IN the memories captured!
Posted on March 13, 2013
Coordinate but don’t match. When styling a session, I like to start out with a basic color palette and go from there. It can help to have one “rock star” in the photos who carries a pattern in their outfit that the rest of the group’s clothing or accessories pulls from, while keeping everyone else’s outfits more simple. You can do this with a neutral and a few colorful brights, or try a softer palette that has different tonal ranges of the same shades.
Pick out a few color pops to coordinate between subjects when working with a palette of softer tones or neutrals.
It tends to be easier to find the “center stage” pieces in girls and women’s clothing, so I’ll often start with the females and then pull colors from their outfits to create a look for the boys and dads.
Accessorize … and think outside the box. Scarves, hats, flowers in the hair for girls, jewelry, sweaters, vests, jackets, etc. – all these things can take a ho-hum image and make it feel “complete.” Don’t let the accessories overwhelm the subject or the photos though. I believe that especially with sweet babies and toddlers that they don’t need much in the way of “accessories” … they are beautiful in their simple purity, and I want them to be the star of the show instead of making one’s eye go straight to a giant headband as big as their head as they sit awkwardly in a big bucket. I want the viewer to notice my subject and their personality first … the accessories and clothing should just complement them – not be center stage. Choose your accent colors and fill in outfits with those punches of color in accessories … for instance, if big sister’s patterned dress has tones of aqua, coral and gray, have mom wear a coral headband and little brother in an aqua pair of Converse and bow tie. Show off the kids’ and your unique personality with accessories!
There are a few bonuses to using accessories well (as well as layers). One is that changing them up a bit throughout the session can give you multiple looks without having to do many wardrobe changes. They can also be something that the subjects can interact with … a sassy little tip of the hat, holding the ends of a scarf while running and letting it billow behind you, grabbing the lapels of a husbands jacket while pulling him close for a kiss … all these little gestures and ways to interact (and become more comfortable in front of the camera) can be made possible with styling choices. Many of my sessions will feature items used outside their intended use or subject … my girls are often seen in mommy’s hats or scarves (scarves can be used in different ways like wrapped around their shoulders, as a hair piece, etc) and they love to wear my costume jewelry.
Layers and textures are beautiful and create interest in photos. I absolutely love using multiple textures and layers, especially important when working with a color palette a bit on the neutral or softer side (with a subtle color pop here or there). When I say textures one of the ways to achieve this is with different clothing materials and accents – tweed, crochet and embroidery details, lace, hand knit items, smocking, ribbons, ruffles, etc. Also, having different layers of clothing and accessories can add another dimension to the overall texture of the image. These details and added depth are especially important in black and white images. And it can be done beautifully with colorful brights or just pops of color here and there as well … follow your own vision and style, also looking to what fits your subjects best.
Think about subtle props that blend with the the vibe of the session as well, but keep them simple and meaningful. A handful of flowers that are a natural, neutral color or that coordinate with color pops in the subjects’ clothing … a vintage camera … a basket of apples … or the absolute best type of prop is something that is meaningful to the subject (grandpa’s vintage camera, their favorite stuffed animal, a quilt made by great grandma, the family’s beloved pet). But don’t let the prop be an odd distraction – make sure it “makes sense” being in the photo and blends well with the whole vision you had in mind for the shoot.
Shoes matter. Please don’t wear sneakers … unless we’re talking about some funky Converse that go with the feel of the session. The choice of shoes can make or break an outfit. Slipping on a pair of hip, distressed boots or some colorful ballet flats can tie everything together and complete the feel of the session. Think about coordinating those bright and colorful shoes with other accessories and clothing in the photo – not necessarily on the subject themselves, but rather match little sister’s bright turquoise shoes to the sweater or scarf her mama is wearing. It ties everything together without looking too match-y match-y. And many times NO shoes looks best, especially if you’ll be sitting or in poses where the bottoms of shoes can be seen – that never looks pretty. And don’t forget some funky socks to add another splash of color or personality if your overall look of the session is fun and bright.
How will the images be displayed? Think about the primary reason you are doing the session and dress accordingly. For instance, if it’s for Christmas cards you might want to dress in wintry, seasonal clothing … for a gallery canvas in the living room, think about coordinating with the colors and feel of your decor. For the canvases I hung in my girls’ playroom I dressed them in twirly, pink dresses and they ran dancing through the sand on the beach, which meshed perfectly in the girly room that’s always filled with giggles and play.
This is more of a personal choice, but I tend to choose clothing that is timeless, perhaps a little vintage in style … but whatever is your style, make sure your choices won’t look terribly dated years from now (or months in the case of some quickly passing trends). I personally love to use softer or neutral tones (with a color pop here and there) and classic shapes, then add interest with accessories, layers and lots of interesting textures. I also happen to love bright and colorful as long as it’s not obnoxious or distracting from the subject’s personality and face. Of course, this is a personal choice and many families will choose to go all out in the latest trends, thinking of their clothing choices as a sort of time stamp in their images.
When shooting in wide open locations and it involves kiddos, I love to have some movement and flow in their clothing and accessories. Little ones are fond of jumping, dancing, and being wild. Nothing better than a twirly, whirly dress to accentuate all that beautiful movement and childhood innocence. Something as simple as a scarf trailing behind or a playful super hero cape can be fun for the boys.
Get comfortable. Make sure that the children can move freely in their outfits and that they aren’t going to be pulling and scratching at their new clothes … you want them happy and comfortable, not grouchy and miserable during the shoot! This means letting them have some input in what they wear. Kids who help dress themselves will not only be much happier campers when shooting time comes, but you’ll let their own beautiful personalities shine through in the images. Also, try not to make kids change outfits more than a couple times – another reason all those layers and accessories can be handy. The same goes for you – make sure that you select an outfit that makes you feel stunning and relaxed.
Patterns are good – in moderation! Patterns can add visual interest and texture as well as a good dose of personality. Just make sure that either just one person is in a pattern with the rest of the subjects in simple, more solid color pieces or the patterns are subtle and complementary (for instance, a teeny tiny polka dot tie on a little boy next to his sisters bold color blocked pattern can look very complementary).
Think about your location and make sure your wardrobe complements the surroundings. For example, at a location in a field with a rustic barn in the background would be perfect for a little girl dressed in a simple, vintage style dress with Hunter wellies, pig tails and carrying a little vintage tin pail full of wildflowers … that same look might be out of place in an urban setting with a graffiti wall in the background. Also, consider how well the colors and patterns in the wardrobes will stand out against the backdrops of your location … a field of bluebonnets might not be complemented by an outfit with a floral pattern or the same blues and greens in it, but would look beautiful with a solid coral colored dress to pop off of the colors of the flowers and grass. Many times I’ll select a location first and then create the wardrobe, accessories and props to fit with the vision I see for the surroundings and session vibe I want to come out of it.
For photographers hoping to inspire your clients in their choices of clothing and accessories, make sure that the work you are displaying portrays the kind of look that meshes with your style. Offer to help select clothing and even go the extra step to assist in shopping for new pieces or outfits. Many times I’ll arrive at a client’s home and they’ll have put together several options for looks for the kids or family, and then I can assist in making the final decisions. Another quick option is to just have them email you a few quick iPhone shots of the outfits they are considering so you can lend a little guidance. And feel free to point them to this post for pointers and examples!
A few things NOT to do … many of them obvious no-no’s but important to include again as a refresher.
• Avoid anything with logos, graphics, characters, labels, etc. These tend to take the “finished” look of a professional portrait down a few notches, can be distracting (who wants people to first notice the Nike or Gap logo before the adorable little kid’s smile?) and will date a photo quickly. I’m having flashbacks to me wearing Esprit tee-shirts with my Guess jeans back in grade school, right along side my little brother in his Gotcha shirt (and if you’re sitting there wondering what I’m talking about, you must not be an 80′s child, LOL). Note: There are a few instances where a more stylized graphic on a shirt can look good if it fits the vibe of a photo, for instance, in my six year old’s birthday session we did a total punk rock theme to go along with her party … she wore a Johnny Cash tee with her tutu and baby sis rocked a Ramones tee.
• If anyone is needing a trip to the salon, be sure to let the hair cut grow out a week or so in order to look most natural.
• Don’t make everyone wear all the same color … matching is boring and dated. Coordinate colors and looks, letting everyone have their own spin on the color palette (and every person does not – should not – have every color used in the color palette). And please no families all dressed in khaki pants, or all in denim and white shirts.
• While trying to stay current and fashionable, do avoid obvious trends that will be dated soon. You can do fashion forward while still remaining timeless.
• No bright white socks and no sneakers unless we’re talking about something fashion forward and simple like Converse or Vans. And also be sure to remove watches or jewelry not complementary to the session’s look.
- Clothing for Girls and Boys
- Clothing for Girls
- Sale Boutiques - for women and the whole family
- Miscellany and Accessories
Clothing for Boys and Girls
Zulily (visit the kid’s sections often to catch the good boutiques when they pop up)
Rue La La (visit the kid’s sections often to catch the good boutiques when they pop up)
Hautelook (visit the kid’s sections often to catch the good boutiques when they pop up)
Gap Kids (shop selectively – much of it can be on the tacky side, so pick and choose carefully … and the good stuff seems to sell out fast)
Target stores also have great options for the littlest kids. I think most of their stuff for children once they hit about 6 years old starts to get a bit on the tacky side of things though.
Clothing for Girls
My Little Jules – A wonderful boutique that carries a wide range of clothing, shoes and accessories for little ones. Dollcake is one of our favorite brands there, as well as the Livie and Luca shoes.
Zulily (visit the kid’s sections often to catch the good boutiques when they pop up)
Rue La La (visit the kid’s sections often to catch the good boutiques when they pop up)
Hautelook (visit the kid’s sections often to catch the good boutiques when they pop up)
a. bird – Timeless, classic creations.
TutuDuMonde – Gorgeous creations for little girls … a bit on the spend side, these are investment pieces.
ETSY Seller – Mary Gao – Inexpensive, unique finds. We love the little matching jacket and skirt combos, as well as the suspender skirt rompers.
Sanguinetti Clothing – Unique, beautifully made designer clothing for girls.
Lil Blue Boo – My girls love LBB dresses for playtime – perfectly cute and comfortable!
Wild Things Dresses – Handmade, adorable dresses featuring sweet animals and lots of whimsy!
A good portion of what I choose for my own kids and for myself are finds when good boutiques come on the following sites (you have to keep an eye out because when a good brand pops up they tend to sell quickly).
These sites also have great finds for the rest of the family, even for your home. I find a lot of my jeans there, as well as fun shoes, accessories and sweaters. Some of the brands I’ve picked up for myself there are 7 For All Mankind jeans, Hudson jeans, Paige Denim, Current & Elliot jeans (yes, I love my denim), Free People, some vintage finds when they have a Vintage Bazaar boutique (great for props), etc.
Other sites and stores I like shopping at for myself are
Miscellaneous, hats, newborn goodies and fun accessories
Newborn accessories (and amazing guidebook and workshops) - Robin Long Photography
Bonnets, hats, newborn accessories - Veronika G.
Knit hats - Sweet Pea Toads
Newborn hats, pants, accessories, etc. – FAAS, Inc.
Shoe Wings - SmallFly
Big and little girls hair pieces - Emily Zych
Newborn accessories - Lilian Grace
- What to Wear Example 1
- What to Wear Example 2
- What to Wear Example 3
- Personality in Props and Accessories
- Let Them Be Little and Have Fun
- Coordinate Color in Accessories
- Frame the Face
- Light, Soft Neutrals
- Coordinate With Location, Match Accessories
- Neutrals, Layers and Textures
- Interesting, Layered Accessories
- Colorful Brights Complement Location
- One Big Statement Accessory
- Soft, Complementary Color Palette and Details